Wanna be Runner

Um yeah... not as cool this time

2009-08-28T08:34:00.000-07:00

Can I just start off by saying how unfair it is that my body doesn't feel the true effects of any workout I do until at least 24 hours. Which is fine and dandy but if you workout every other day, there is no time to recover. Wednesday morning my legs were... well... sore. You know most days you just take for granted that your legs and other limbs are just connected to your body. You know they are there but you don't' really feel them. Yeah... i was very conscious of my legs all day Wednesday. They were screaming.... don't worry danielle... we won't let you forget the torture you put us through last night. You tortured us last tonight.... today we torture you. So, in thinking my legs were sore on Wednesday they would of started to recover and I wouldn't feel as bad Thursday... yeah right. But even with sore legs I was still looking forward to last night so I could try out my new run.

I told the hubby that it was the 5 minute warm-up that really killed my legs and he agreed.. well he actually suggested and I agreed that he would do the first half of the workout with his vest on so he could stay more down near my pace and then we would swing back near the house so he could drop off his vest and he could really push himself. We didn't do the full workout, it was just a regular cardio day for him so we stayed in our very flat, straight, and NO hills neighborhood. We did our warm-up and my slow-jog and then it was time to put my new found stride to the test. But this time... it wasn't as easy going. The first minute was alright but didn't feel as good. We went down to our fast-walk recovery and then we did the second minute burst. This section I could just feel myself running sloppy. I was very heavy, leading with the top part of my body, and could feel i was just just hitting the ground hard... just very sloppy. So I took a little bit more time to recover but when i started in on my third minute burst, my shins were beyond even a slow jog and I ended up walking the rest of our workout, minus the short sprint burst the hubby made me do at the end. But even after what I consider a bad run, I'm still optimistic and ready to get out there and try it again. I know this run was just bad... bad in form, my body wasn't' recovering so I'm optimistic knowing it wasn't my capabilities but attributes I could work on and improve. Its just not simply i can't do it, its I need to work on aspects that will make it easier.

Have I found my stride?

2009-08-27T08:10:00.000-07:00

This month has been full of lots of ups and downs with the ol' weightloss thing. Just a word of advice... don't let your boss get fired in the middle of the month when you are trying to watch your eating. Let me tell you... the "down" part of this month has been learning how to balance being extremely busy at work and finding the motivation to go to the gym after spending all day stressed out... and now I have to go home and find something healthy to eat? Yeah Right. The "up" part of the month has been when the hubster decided it was time to buckle down and loose the last 30 pounds (he has already lost 50 this year). It makes it a tad easier when you have someone holding you accountable, unless he is going through a rough couple of days and doesn't want to work out either. You all know me by now... all I need is a glimmer of an excuse and I'm done.

Part of the hubby's workout plan is a 20 minute treadmill workout that has him doing lunges, walking, jogging and different speeds and inclines. I stand behind him laughing at hard he is having to work. Yeah... about that, he doesn't appreciate it much and decided to surprise me the other night on our "walk" with his workout. Over the last month we have been taking walks late at night, usually after dinner so we aren't sitting there like bumps on a log watching TV and having our yummy dinner find permanent residence in fat places. Every few weeks we would substitute our walks for a run. Let me explain how my run is... its more of a fast walk in a jogging motion. Literally, I could walk faster than what my run/jog is. I will jog for 30 seconds and walk for 90 seconds while he will jog for 90 seconds and walk for 30 (totally opposite for me). He will jog with me for the first 30 and then run ahead and loop back and so forth until our 30 minutes. .... Which is what I thought was going to happen Tuesday night. We start off with our 5 minute warm-up, which I might add had already killed my legs before we even really started. Usually the hubby will wear a 20 pound weight vest which slows him down to my speed, which he left at home Tuesday night. Anywho... first off, a 2 minute jog. Doesn't sound like a big deal right, unless you are used to only going for 30 seconds which was followed by 2 minutes of lunges. After the dreadful lunges was a fast walk and then MORE lunges! What?!?! Are you kidding me? By then we had reached a small decline and was to slow run/jog down which should of been a piece of cake if my legs weren't already jello (and just to be honest for the record, i had to walk down the decline). We then fast-walked up the hill.. down the hill.. and then back up the hill, well, close enough to the schedule. We got into his parents neighborhood and it was a "do what you can" which mine is alot more walking then jogging but I tried... kind of. Then then inspiring hubby asks... "Do you have one more 1 minute burst" which i replied with a "well... why not". And this is where it gets really cool. I start off with what could be considered a slow run for most people... and it was somewhat of a shallow downhill... but it felt GREAT! My hurting legs and exploding lungs... still there but not really holding me back. He only had us do a minute and I was a little disappointed to slow down but didn't want to push myself into puking, which probably would of been closely followed.

Can this be true... have I found my stride? Was my slow jog that is faster than a speed-walk holding me back? I am actually very interested in finding out and looking forward to our next run.

(Oh.. and also for the record.. during our cool down after our minute burst, my little toes went numb. And we had to then walk back the 2 miles to our house which was less than a fast walk but more than a leisure walk).

Just a litttle... bit... farther....

2009-08-01T10:08:00.000-07:00

I can almost reach it.... just a little bit farther.... i almost have a good grip..... ahhhhh.... run danielle run..... hmph... bleph..... thud. Ow!

(wait a minute while i catch my breath.....)

Phew.... I did it!! I finally caught up with the weightoss wagon and jumped on (i mean you did hear the loud thump as i jumped on it with this big butt landing in the middle, right?). And this time I am remembering to put on my seat belt b/c i don't want to fall off again.

Time and Pounds

2009-07-27T07:06:00.000-07:00

Ohh Wee... where the heck did the time go? And more importantly.... where the heck did these extra pounds come from? I was hoping to make the post...you know the one saying I made my goal and lost all the weight. It comes with great sadness that I have to announce that my lost pounds have found me again. Not all of them, some of them I dumped in the middle of a corn field so they couldn't find me, but some.... more importantly 15 of them found me again and have decided to make my stomach their new home. I'm not surprised, I didn't really think I could keep the weight off while doing nothing. Its my own fault, I fell of the wagon and found the old excuse I'll work on it next week. Next week turned into next month and now I sit here at the end of July and am very disappointed in myself.

Not much else to say. Go ahead, give me the lecture, I deserve it.

7 months ago....

2009-04-06T12:34:00.000-07:00

... I completely fell off the "running" wagon. Once I picked myself up and cursed the damn wagon, I dusted myself off and never looked back. Until I was faced with my arch enemy... the scale. That hunk of junk metal told me I weighed 193 pounds and as much as I wanted to call it a liar, I secretly knew the truth. I knew my "fat" clothes were no longer fitting. You girls know what I mean, that pair of jeans or shirt in the back of your closest that you bought reluctantly because your other clothes didn't fit. You didn't really want to buy new clothes because you were going to loose all that weight, but you couldn't squeeze yourself into your normal clothes. Those clothes no longer fit me and still I lived in denial blaming it on all that water weight (yeah right). But seeing those numbers flash up on that spiteful scale I knew it was time to do something. Knowing that I could not do this on my own, I called in the doctor and got the magic pill.

Its not really magic but it did make my appetite disappear. And since I'm always hungry I think I can get away with calling it magic. I know its not the most ideal way to loose weight but after battling it myself for three years I waved the flag of defeat and made the appointment. The first month I didn't think it was working, I wasn't hungry but I didn't feel or look like any of the weight was coming off. So you can imagine my surprise when I went back for my one month appt and the scale said I was 15 pounds lighter. I happily accepted that piece of information, picked up my new prescription and went on my way. In that course of the month I didn't get too many of the awful side effects. The cotton mouth from hell was my biggest problem but I had just lost 15 pounds doing nothing, I will take the side effects. The last week of the first month we took our annual vacation up to the mountains and actually stayed a whole week this time. We hiked up a few waterfalls, climbed a side of a mountain, and canoed on the river (well, i canoed halfway and the wonderful hubby had to get us back). I felt great and had already jump-started an exercise regime so when we returned back to the daily grind, I found myself actually wanting to go to the gym. I found some of my pants starting to get bigger and I was still making healthy food choices (the best perk of the meds I took, I learned how to control my portions and make healthy snack choices). Knowing of my lack of muscle and stamina last summer with my attempts at running, I took special notice in my workouts concentrating on my leg strength and lung capacity.

This brings us to the holidays. I had a minor problem with some dental stuff and because the only way I could make the pain go away was lots and lots of Aleve, I decided it wasn't the best to take with my magic pills. I did good through the holidays, kind of found myself finding excuses not to go the gym (it really is difficult to workout when your mouth is throbbing from pain) but you guys know me well enough that I don't need that much of a reason to use an excuse. I didn't lose anymore weight, but I have done a really good job maintaining it.

Today, with my friend from work, starts my two month personal training. I am 30 pounds down from where I started back in September and have 20 pounds to go. I am down from size 18-16 to a 14 and my shirts are Larges not XL's (in honesty I think i was slightly larger than a size 18 but if an 18 didn't fit, I stopped trying things on). I am no longer taking my magic pills, I want to do the rest on my own. And ironically knowing that I have some pills left over for those weeks where my hunger takes over my life and knowing that I look for any glimmer of an excuse, I don't find myself wanting to take the last 10.

And just maybe... just maybe when I reach my goal I will find myself back to where I began and still want to become a runner. So this blog has now turned into my weight/exercise/dreams of running updates.

Defeated with a small chance of hope

2008-09-01T06:17:00.001-07:00

First I will deliver the bad news... I suck at running. Well crud, that isn't really news.

I went to my run Saturday morning feeling very confident. I left feeling extremely defeated. In my previous run I stayed towards the front and could feel a gap starting so this week I made it a point to stay towards the back of the pack. On one hand I'm glad b/c I really would of been a road block at the front but it made it easier to fall very behind. I made it to about minute 7-9 (already extremely behind everyone else) before I gave up and ended up walking the rest of the trail. I had been thinking that I could attempt the half-marathon in February, but all I want to do now is finish the program. I'm already dreading next week, its a 30 minute run/walk and I can't make it past minute 7!

Now.. for my silver lining. I have asked Chip to become my running partner. During the week I have the motivation to get out there and actually do it, my motivation fails when I have to push through the "hard"part. Its too easy for me to say, I'll walk this block and then I will run.... in other words, excuse, excuse, excuse. I need someone to keep me going, to watch the timer for me so that is not all I am concentrating on. We went out this morning and I'm proud to announce I did the full 22 minutes!! Very slowly, not at all at the speed of my pace group on Saturday mornings... but I did the 22 minutes. I don't want to set my hopes up again, but I don't feel as defeated as I did on Saturday.

Rain, Rain go away.. Wait, come back!

2008-08-27T07:08:00.000-07:00

To follow up on my last post, which also happened to be my last run, I was miserable and could not walk for a couple of days. My legs were so sore and were very mad at me. Then Tropical Storm Fay made its debut and made running difficult. And yes, I know it sounds just like another excuse and yes I know you can run in the rain. But I'm not running during a tropical storm so my excuse is valid this time, and my lack of motivation helped my excuse remain strong.

With the rain gone as well as my limited motivation, I did venture out on my own last night. According to my running schedule, I should be up to a 25 minute run/walk. I did do my 25 minutes last night, alot more walking than running. To be more exact, 5 minutes of walk/run and the rest just walking.

I don't understand my motivation. I'm motivated in the fact I want to do this, I just lack the motivation of actually doing it. I mean I really, really want this. I get out there on my "run" and the minute I feel tired or hurt, I quit. And I know it will do nothing but make me mad when I think back on it but yet I still do it. I lack the determination to push past my boundaries.

I will be out of town this weekend so it will be another weekend without my group run, ast week was cancelled due to TS Faye and the fact our location was under water. When I do re-join the group they will be up to a 40 minute run/walk. 40 minutes..... 40 MINUTES!!! I can't even make it 5, what am I going to do?

No holding back now

2008-08-16T05:21:00.000-07:00

My bad habits finally trumped my motivation, as you can tell by my lack of absoutely no posting. In the back of my mind.... waaayyyy way back there, I knew I needed to get back out there and get used to running. But the front of my brain that controls everything else kidnapped the back half and said to it "Nah, she'll be fine, she will start running when her program starts".

And let me tell you... my back brain was right and now I'm paying for it. Today was the first day of my Galloway Let's Get started program. We started off 1 minute run, 1 minute walk, 1 minute run, puke. Okay, well I didn't really puke but felt like it many times. They told us they will start us off at 1 and 1 for this week then next week we will break out into our pace groups. Yeah, Danielle will be going down a level. Next week is 20 minutes and today at minute 7 is when I thought my legs were going to fall off. In the next nine weeks I will have my group training on Saturday mornings... at 7am on Saturday mornings. Yeah, that sucked this morning especially since I have an Olympic hangover, dang Olympics going onto until past midnight. Anywho by the end of 9 weeks they think that our group will be ready for a 5K. A what?

Oh, and to top my morning off (as if it couldn't get any better) I locked my keys in the car. My bright idea was to take my car key off the chain so I wouldn't have to carry around the whole set. Would of been a great plan if I hadn't grabbed the wrong key. Luckily our meeting place was just a few doors down from where I work where I now sit waiting for someone to come pick me up.

I hang my head in shame

2008-06-30T08:15:00.000-07:00

I'm sure you can already assume that my lack of posting is directly correlated to my lack of running. I've been managing about once a week, so every I'm having to start over on week 1 every monday. My old cheating habits tells me I should just skip ahead to week 2 b/c obviously week 1 is holding me back (yeah right). But then I can't also finish week 1 so which bad habit trumps the other one?

My common excuses for the past four weeks: Its too hot (which it really is, hard to run in 95 degree weather), I didn't do it yesterday so whats one more day, I'll run in the morning... I'll run after work cycle.

The good side.. I still haven't given up hope yet. I'm bound to do this, I just need my lazy butt to get the message. My motivation still, and the main reason I did it, is I'm still signed up for the Jeff Galloway's Getting Started running to start in August, which I'm not wasting 70 bucks. I know the class is for all beginning stages, I would just like to be in just a little bit more shape before the class starts. Listen to me... another freaking excuse.. I don't have to do it now b/c I will do it in my class. Blast it... just freaking do it Danielle.

First day Complete

2008-05-16T06:38:00.001-07:00

Last night I did about 20 minutes of run/walk. Well.. I did more walking than running, but I did it.

I also went out and bought Jeff Galloways Book "Getting Started Running" and read the first few chapters last night. I was skimming the book and looking at his training schedule and it looks just so much more friendly than other programs I have tried. So I'm getting really excited about this, I almost think I can do it.

I'm Officially Comitted

2008-05-15T08:32:00.000-07:00

I did it.. I registered for my first running program. So either I just paid 69 bucks to learn how to run or I just paid 69 bucks to put towards my wishful thinking of becoming a runner. The training doesn't start until August 16, so my "plan" is to start running a little bit on my own so I can come up to the beginner level. And yes, I know I'm a beginner as I write this, but honestly I feel like I'm below a beginner status. I can't run down the block, that is a little less than a beginner. I'm a .... pre-beginner. Eh, I need to come up with a cooler name.

So this morning I had my last french toast stick from Burger King. My running shoes are in the car and I'm going start my plan tonite. And just maybe I will be a beginner once I start my program in August.

Oh.. and if you want to know what the heck I'm talking about, here is the running program I joined. I will be doing the Getting Started program. I know it says for the half-marathon, but one big goal at a time. My goal today, and until I start the program in august, is to be able to run a half-mile.

Dreams of Running

2008-05-06T11:24:00.000-07:00

Every once in awhile I will have a dream that I'm running. I will actually stop to think in my dream..."Hey, I'm running" and then just continue on like its no big deal. But the sad reality is that I really can't run. Oh, I've tried over the years and even deluded myself that I could be on my high school track team. But the truth is... if you offered to pay me $1000, I still couldn't make it down the street.

What sucks most... is that I really truly would love to become a runner. I love watching people on the river walk who run for miles... they look so peaceful. I want to become one of those people. I've tried those programs where you walk and then run then walk again. The entice me with the title "Couch potato to 5K". I have even attempted it once, heck one time I even dragged Chip out there. But then come on the shin splints and my arch hurting... every excuse I can think of and which makes it easy for me to quit.

This morning I got to work and saw some fitness article on my e-mail (yes, that is also another goal, to get fit). I remembered awhile back I had posted a question to one of these running websites and after 5 weeks I decided to actually follow up on it (can you sense my level of motivation?) And I don't even remember why I decided today would be the day, but I feel so determined to actually do this. And now you can follow along with me in my journey. My name is Danielle and I'm a wanna-be-runner.